I woke this morning and looked out the window and it was the most beautiful picture. The clouds were low with a light fog covering the deep greens of the spring filled morning. My eyes were fixed on the beauty and I desperately wanted ignore the hidden message- for you, for me and for all who know and read our story. I wanted to just keep it there, fall back to sleep for an hour or so, dream sweet dreams and wake to a really happy Mother’s Day.
But ignore I could not. The fog was like pure tears hanging from each leaf. The air was thick like the lump in my throat. This same, beautiful picture out my window was full of ache for something greater. My window became a mirror showing the beauty in my life perfectly blended with heartache.
And it truly was beautiful. It was hopeful.
I laid back in my bed, adamant to just enjoy the pitter patter of feet scrambling around to gather gifts, wondering when their momma would wake up to enjoy the labor of their love and the silent ‘hush’ of their father trying desperately to keep momma bear asleep. I loved it so much and my heart was swollen with love but I missed another set of feet. I wondered what Zekey would have made, what he would have said.
The truth is, Mother’s Day is a gift but it’s full of ache, longing for something that was, or what could be. It’s just another arrow pointing to what’s to come and there is beauty and there is ache in that.
I am so thankful for my Creator and the painted picture out my window. It was a precious glimpse of the beauty in today and the Hope of what’s to come.