Please take me off your pedestal

I am so thankful and humbled by how God uses this silly, little blog to bless others, bring spiritual growth and show how people can actually live in a life of chaos and loss.

The thing is, I am far from perfect.  I do not pretend I am something I am not on here but maybe, because of my faith at times, you think I am this way all of the time.

I’m here to set the record straight.  I’m not full of hope always.  I sometimes cuss.  I don’t keep a cleaning schedule and it’s a good week if I cook 3 dinners at home.

I have a hard time loving certain people due to hurt.  I have fears higher than mountains, even in ways God has told me He’s called me.  I’m not always humble and I don’t like to blend in.

I love food far too much and sometimes eat only sugary foods all the live long day.  I get cranky when people expect me to be or do something that my life clearly (or not so clearly) doesn’t allow and quick to point that out.

I judge.  I am not as respectful to my husband as I should be.  I snap at my children because it’s way easier than responding in love.  I’m tired and wonder when this trial will end.

I’m weary.  I…

I’m not….perfect or super holy.

I am me, growing, changing, evolving and my desire truly is to be more like Jesus and love more like He.  That’s something that I can cling to when all I see is what I’m lacking in.

I write this to anyone who wonders, “How does she do it?!”or says, “You are superwoman!”

I tweeted today, “As soon as we forget the only thing separating us from the unsaved is Jesus in us, we take glory from God onto ourselves. #falseglory”. 

And the same goes for my life.  It’s Jesus in me that is giving me what I need, my daily bread, if you will, to keep me going.  To keep me from a state of constant chaos.  It’s Him in me.  That’s all.  I refuse to take credit because I am just another sinful person fighting my flesh daily. 

It’s only when my eyes are on Him, I become more of who I was originally created to be pushing through the joys and trials this life is bound to bring.

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