Steps to keeping the "Me" in "Mom"

Just random thoughts I have to remind myself that even though (as we all agree to) being a mother is such a blessing,  I’m still my own person and not defined as “mom”.  Definition of Breena is not, “Mother of 4″ although that’s how I feel sometimes.

1. Wear lipstick…or whatever make-up that makes you feel beautiful.  I’ve been doing it more lately and it reminds me of my quirky, love-the-latest-trend self.  I feel beautiful and it doesn’t say, “Oh, she’s a mom” (like when I’m dressed in scrubs with my hair thrown up with bits of oatmeal stuck in it).  It says, “She’s confident in who she is and feels good in her own skin.”  Yeah, more lipstick.

2. Have a diaper bag AND a purse.  Ugh!  I HATE digging through my “purse” which is actually a bag so that I can fit all the baby stuff just in case I do not bring my diaper bag and it’s heavy and gross and I just want to separate church from state, okay??!!?  You should too.  A bag/purse for you, and a bag for babies. End of story.

3. Rock.It.Out.Momma.  What’s a song that causes you to get off your feet, dance and sing as if you were just crowned “American Idol.”  Listen to that more often…Mind is currently, “Rolling In The Deep”  It’s over-played but I wouldn’t know that because I only listen to it on the C.D. my hubby made for me so I can control how many times I want to rock out to it ( usually with the kids in tow, but they enjoy it, too!).

4. Treat yourself to something that feeds your soul at least once a week (or every night if you can!).  For me currently, it’s sewing and singing through worship and Ember.  It’s using something God has given me passion for to glorify Him and he blesses me back by breathing life into me through it.  SO glad I’m making these things a priority.

5. Remind your hubby what made him fall in love with you in the first place.  It’s so easy to get caught up in being a momma all day and when he gets home, well he gets what’s left.  I am still working on this so if you have any ideas other than getting dressed for the day, having the house somewhat picked up and dinner on the table (oh, I am out of breath after just typing that!) please do share!  Our men are crazy important in the equation of who we are and it’s important we let them know and feel that.

6. Have girl time.  Oh, I LOVE girl time!  Whether it be with other momma’s with their kids or without our kids or having time with other woman in different stages of life, it’s just good for the soul, baby! 

7. Work out.  Yeah…working on working out 😉  I’ll just stop riiiiiight there.

What steps do you take to help yourself remember that originally, God created you in His image.  The other stuff are extra blessings :) 


  • Reply January 18, 2012


    Love this, my friend! It’s so crucial for me (and everyone else) to remember that I was, indeed, someone before becoming mommy! Whether its a little makeup, a fun scarf, an extra long shower, drive-thru coffee, or my fave indie band, its important to have some of that sprinkled throughout the week. It’s healthy for me and everyone around me! Oh, and Phil and I have to really TALK a few times a week, hopefully each night. We laugh and watch shows together and it reminds us why we like each other :)

  • Reply January 18, 2012


    Amen!!! Love this! Time with the hubs after the kids go to be is SO crucial. Yes, watching tv shows while cracking up is so much fun! Thanks for your awesome comment!

  • Reply January 18, 2012


    I completely agree!!! I was just thinking about this very same thing this weekend – at a Pure Romance Party – of ALL places! LOL!
    I have traded A LOT of myself for the role of “mommy.” BUT nevertheless, there are certain parts of me that I grip tightly to & will not let go of…I used to think this was selfish of me but have realized that it’s necessary for me to BE ME & know/feel like someone other than MOMMY ALLLLLL the time. I love that you sport your lipstick, Breena! I do the same thing…along with my mascara. Without those two beauty staples I look like I’m dead…seriously. And I also keep my purse separate from our diaper bag…and if I catch my boys snooping in it, it’s not pretty – Hands off, Buster! Lately Andy & I have been going to bed at the same time every night. I used to hate this & fight it. I’m a night owl…but since I’ve given in, it’s been awesome! We talk, we do devotions, we laugh, we….uhhhh sleep…WE, Andy & Julie, not MOM & DAD, spend time together.
    I’m so thankful for this post! God has put so many treasures & gifts in us as women that reflect HIM & his Glory. Being a mom might be one of those gifts but like you, I think it’s important to remember that I’m not defined by “mom” but rather that I’m a child of God :)

  • Reply January 18, 2012

    shannon chappell

    Great post! I used to be addicted to lip gloss and just recently realized that I haven’t worn it in YEARS! I bought some the other day and I can’t even describe how good it feels to reach into my coat pocket to grab some and put it on. Sounds dumb but it’s true. It’s the little things! 😉

  • Reply January 19, 2012


    Julie, makes sense with boys and “No touch mommies purse!” rule. ha ha! Sounds like you already do these things…gosh, I posted this knowing I have to WORK on them. I like to be in comfy clothes all day but I ALSO like to look good for my man 😉 Spending time at night with Andy is a MUST for our marriage…

  • Reply January 19, 2012


    Shannon, YES! Lip gloss can be so pretty and make us look so much more put together…you’re right. The little things :)

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